G A Hauser

Jordon Buck doesn' believe in the big romance, the one love, but he's ready to settle down and his girlfriend Fawn seems to be as good a candidate as any. The two engage a wedding planner to help with the big day, but when Jordon takes one look at good-looking Tyler Holliday, he's instantly smitten. But gay man don't do monogamous relationships, obviously, so it's better to stay with what he has.

This book just feels really off. How people act and react and interact. It's a bit like fanfiction written by a schoolkid with very limited life experiences. You know, that uncanny valley where things seems normal enough on the surface, but enough things are slightly off to be really creepy.

Even the basic premises. Jordon is engaged to be married to a woman he doesn't really love, who acts like a teenager or maybe a young twenty and suddenly, inexplicably get the hots for his wedding planner. But instead of maybe questioning his relationship he shamelessly flirts with the guy, who actually flirts back and they just kind of ignore the pink elephant in the room that Jordon is going to get married.

A lot of the gay characters act very stereotypical, too. Flirting with everyone, gay or straight, very sexual, very lascivious. And Jordon has this weird notion, that gays cannot be monogamous because gay man keep offering him blowjobs. Apparently he's just that good looking.

And the dialog is just very artificial and stilted, especially after Tyler and Jordon actually hook up. It's sickeningly sweet and cloying. It's also very nearly insta-love.

There's just so much wrong logically with the book, too. E.x. Tyler has business cards with his MySpace profile, where he's friends with pornstars and has posted nude pictures. And then he's surprised that Jordon has figured out he was a pornstar?
Also, how could he have done porn as a 15 year old under his own name? That's illegal, no company could have been stupid enough to just slap prove of their misdeeds right on the movie, even if Tyler was too young to thing about using an alias.
Also, Tyler uses his real age on the internet nowadays, how can't people know he did the movies at 15 instead of 18, as he says. It's simple math.

There where actually some scenes I really liked, especially Tyler and Jordon working out together, cooking, watching the Olympics and becoming friends. It's just all blanketed in a whole empire of weirdness.